Marriage brings changes over the years. You move from apartment to house to having children, to having children in school, to having kids in college, the children’s weddings, grandchildren, aging, and more. Each stage reassures us that, as servants we will grow, learn, and adapt. Also, the person we serve changes. What they enjoyed as a young person (ice cream or vigorous exercise) might change as they age (salads and rest).

As a learner, you ask questions both about serving on the perimeter as well as serving the person. As I ask Lisa about her, I learn her. I ask her for her perceptions about the perimeter because she sees things I do not see, and vice versa. I keep learning. If you have an attitude of a learner and maintain it, you are guaranteed to grow in your calling and ability to fulfill the calling to service.

As a Christian you have an endless supply of patience, kindness, goodness, and self-control flowing through your heart. God has not called you to serve your spouse for decades without fully giving you what you need to fulfill your unique and glorious mission.

Remember the mission you have already chosen is long, challenging, and full of joy, peace, ups and downs, and unpredictable events unique to your marriage and family.

You are not alone on your magnificent quest. You have God, the Word of God, an amazing spouse, your spiritual leaders and community, family, friendships, and unlimited tools to read online and in books over the decades.

You can do this. You are a servant of the Most High God. As you travel faithfully decade after decade, hear the echoes of your Father and Father-in-Law God desiring to say words your heart longs to hear. “Well done my good and faithful servant.”