Addicts of all kinds share (for the most part) some family of origin issues. I am not trying to place blame here, but rather to share with you a cause for intimacy anorexia that I have seen in many people.
These opposite gender relationships are the first and primary relationships where you experienced and generalized about the opposite sex. This is a normal process we all go through.
Three patterns I have heard intimacy anorexics experience from their opposite gender parent:
- Not Safe
- Distant and Emotionally Unavailable Parent
- Sexual Addiction
Each child longs for attachment to their biological parents. This longing doesn’t change because of circumstances or the irresponsibility of the parent. The child’s heart can choose to close and conclude that there is no reason to keep their heart open, since it’s only going to be abandoned anyway.