Here’s an edited and expanded version of your message, maintaining the heart of your insight while deepening its clarity, tone, and spiritual resonance:
God is far more committed to our character development than our comfort. While we often pray for easier circumstances, He is shaping something much deeper within us—Christlikeness. And one of His most effective tools? Marriage.
You can genuinely rejoice in knowing that God, in His wisdom, has chosen the perfect spouse to help shape your soul. Through this relationship, He offers you opportunities to grow in patience, perseverance, humility, self-control, and the other fruits of His Spirit. It may not always feel like a gift—but it is.
Have you noticed that your spouse seems to have a particular flaw or habit that just grinds on you? That one thing that triggers your frustration, defensiveness, or pride? It’s easy to think it’s just their stubbornness—or bad luck on your part. But what if it’s something more? What if it’s part of a divine design—not to break you down, but to build you up into someone more like Jesus?
Think about it: God often uses the most difficult relationships and moments to expose the areas in us that need healing, growth, and surrender. So while it may feel like your spouse is the one who needs to change, perhaps God is most focused on transforming you.
You don’t have to have all the answers today. But what if you began to see your spouse not just as a partner, but as an instrument of God’s grace in your life? What if the very tension you feel is the pressure required to shape a heart that’s more compassionate, more patient, more Christlike?
You decide. But at the very least, be open to the possibility that it’s you God is trying to change—and that it’s all out of love.