The comments or dialogue is what happens to the anorexic after connected sex. The spouses state that the anorexic “gets cold,” “leaves me physically or emotionally,” “gets angry,” “gets very distant,” “critical” or “picks a fight the next day.”
It’s as if the anorexic gets too close and has to sabotage the intimacy he or she was feeling. Be committed to identify and connect after sex instead of pulling away.
Be diligent to talk kindly after sex, to stay embracing or touching your spouse. Make a commitment, the day after, to be vigilant about staying openhearted, nurturing, and kind to your spouse. This ongoing positive reinforcement after sex can strengthen your marriage and your recovery.